


Unrequited

by orphan_account



Category: South Park
Genre: (jealous! kyle), Angry kyle, Angst, Cheating, Jealousy, M/M, Slow Burn, Spooning, Unresolved Feelings
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-09-08
Updated: 2019-11-25
Packaged: 2020-10-12 05:03:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 13,974
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20558684
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Kyle isnotjealous when he sees Cartman making out with Heidi.





	1. Chapter 1

“I don’t understand this shit!” Cartman whined, his head falling into his hands.

“It literally just looks like scribbles and doodles and it makes my brain fucking hurt.” His deep voice was muffled and it made Kyle chuckle. Mainly because it’s been exactly two hours now, two hours of his life (that he will never be able to get back) spent up trying to explain to Cartman how to use the quadratic formula. Yes, you heard that right. Quadratic formula.

But Kyle has dealt with Cartman’s bullshit from day one and had grown a patience that could probably match a surgeons. 

And it wasn’t even like afternoons together were uncommon at this point. They had become a part of his daily routine after both Stan and Kenny made the football team, and sort of forced him to indulge in Cartman’s company. _Assholes,_ he wanted to curse them out badly. __

_ _Well, at least at the beginning of all this shit._ _

_ _At the start of senior year, Cartman had been scouted by the head coach, said that his heavy set figure and towering height could do wonders for the team, but Cartman declined. _ _

_ _Stan and Kenny were baffled as to why he would turn down such an opportunity, as was Kyle, and Cartman explained while eating _his_ mac n’ cheese that _his_ mother packed that it would be ‘a waste of his time’ and more of the same._____ _

_ _ _ _ _ _So off were Stan and Kenny doing their own thing, and Kyle expected nothing to change. Everybody expected nothing to change. Then it happened. Kyle was sitting alone after school with his tattered chem book balanced on his thighs, silently studying. Cartman walked up to him with his thumbs tucked into the straps of his backpack and asked himself over to his house. And Kyle breathed something that sounded out like a ‘yes’. Hesitantly, sure, but yes nonetheless. _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _It was a decision made out of shock and curiosity. Before then they had never really hung out one on one, because, well, _duh_. After Cartman left his house that night, Kyle even told himself this was a one time thing. But it happened another time, and then another, and somehow became an unspoken agreement of sorts for Cartman to show up at his front door, no invite needed. ___ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _The weird part about all of this was that Kyle didn’t mind the unexpected visits. He enjoyed Cartman’s presence. _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _He _really_ enjoyed Cartman’s presence, actually. With no one around and no audience to entertain, civilized (not that civilized but you get the point) conversations were in place, whether they were about which video games were superior at the moment, or if Bebe and Clyde were hooking up or not. ___ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _It didn’t take too long for Kyle to realize how different the adrenaline from their arguments felt from when they were alone from when it happened in the public eye. Kyle wasn’t dumb. He knew what a crush fucking felt like just as well as anybody else. _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _But this, whatever this ‘crush’ thing going on with Cartman, was weird. He had to stop himself from choking whenever their knees pressed together during lunch or when Cartman used his shoulder as an armrest while talking to Kenny about how sick the new Xbox game was. And don’t get him wrong, Kyle was _very_ aware of how lame it was that his heartbeat quickened from such simple interactions.___ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _Like how Cartman was punching his shoulder right now as he laughed at his sluggish learning pace._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _“Stop laughing you self righteous asshole, this shit isn’t funny!”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _“Seriously? God, you’re such a dumbass.” Kyle shook his head and took the pencil out of Cartman’s hand, plugging in the numbers to their places. He finished off the problem, then looked at Cartman expectantly._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _“Get it now?”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _Cartman stared at the math problem in front of him like it was ineligible, his eyebrows furrowed and his face flushed. _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _“Fuck you and fuck your Jew brain! You know, it’s genetically wired in your blood to be good at math.” He stated matter-of-factly. _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _“They teach this shit to my thirteen year old brother, asshole.” Kyle shoved at his shoulder but Cartman didn’t budge. “Now quit your excuses or else I’m kicking you out of my house. I’m being serious.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _The brunet let out a grin that always leaned to the right. It was a startling white smile, the kind that belongs to celebrities and supermodels but somehow found its place on _Eric Cartman’s_ face, and although he really hated to admit it -- made his stomach do flips. For reasons he understood well enough by now.___ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _“You know, that is no way to treat a guest, Kyle. Did your mother not teach you proper etiquette? God bless her soul.” He put a finger in the air and added on as an afterthought, “And I am also offended by your threat, and I think you owe me an apology, bitch.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _“You are so far gone. No way in hell am I saying sorry.” Kyle scoffed. _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _Cartman did not look impressed at all as he looked at Kyle apprehensively, arms crossed, leaned back in his chair and waiting for an apology. It was only when Kyle practically gave him a death stare, he broke. _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _“Whatever, you’re lucky I don’t wanna do math anymore.” _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _Cartman shoved the rolling chair backwards and made himself comfortable on top of Kyle’s brand new king sized bed. Sheila had decided it was time to upgrade from twin to king after she noticed his clothes were growing tighter and so was his shoes. _My boobeh is getting soooo big!_ Her high pitched voice rang throughout his head, and it made the tips of Kyle’s ears red.___ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _The math was getting boring anyways. _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _“Fine. Leave if you want, but I’m tired and I’m gonna take a nap.” Kyle took it upon himself to falter beside Cartman, his eyelids already feeling heavy and the warmth radiating off the large boy beside him not helping either._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _“Don’t pretend like you don’t enjoy my company, Jew,” Cartman said as he laid flat on his back as well, both hands behind his head and his eyes fluttered shut. The fucked-up thing was that he wasn’t wrong in the slightest, but Kyle would never say that out loud._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _And as it turns out, naps together were also a normal occurrence at this point. Sometimes Kyle would even wake up with Cartman snoring in his ear. But it was never unpleasant -- in fact -- it was rather endearing and sort of sweet seeing Cartman look so innocent and vulnerable for a change. And now, as his window was open and the soft cool wind flowed throughout his room, the afternoon sun rays shining directly onto them, it was too easy to drift off to sleep. _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _Thirty minutes had passed before they both were startled by the loud ring that projected out of Cartman’s phone speakers. With a groan, Cartman rubbed his eyes so he can see the message on the screen with clarity, and Kyle watched as his expression creased with annoyance. He didn’t bother responding to whoever was on the other end, and instead rolled his eyes, throwing his phone back beside him._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _“Who was that?” Kyle asked lazily._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _Cartman waved a hand dismissively. “Just Heidi being a total bitch.” _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _Kyle didn’t say anything. He didn’t have to, he just turned his head and looked at the brunet, with his eyebrows raised and a single nod of his head._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _Cartman groaned out loud. “I forget to respond to her texts for an hour or two, and she loses her shit! Kyle, I’m not kidding when I say this, but I don’t think she understands the concept of personal space and it’s fucking irritating me.” _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _In his ears, it just sounded like Heidi being a caring and attentive girlfriend, and Cartman just being a douche as per usual. Kyle was still half-asleep, half-awake and not in the mood to really argue right now._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _“You know, I think you’re the one being an asshole, dude.” Kyle said in the rational tone he used when he wanted Cartman to just _listen.____ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _“Hmm...” Cartman yawned in a dramatic fashion, the only one he knew. He tugged down his bright red shirt that was riding up his stomach, revealing a soft belly that Kyle loved and knew so well. He couldn’t help but feel a pang of disappointment when he could no longer see the window of pale skin. _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _“I’ll let you explain yourself, Jew.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _Kyle stared at the ceiling which was dotted with those shitty cheap green stars that glowed in the dark, and desperately tried to collect his thoughts. _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _“You get together with someone because you enjoy talking to them, and you don’t get to ignore them because it is inconvenient or some off-handed bullshit like that.” Kyle continued. _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _All he heard from Cartman was a lazy grunt of admission. He turned his head to the side to see him running a hand through his chestnut brown hair, a trait he had always been jealous of. His soft-to-the-touch hair looked perfect always, it really was maddening and charming at the same time. Even Kyle stopped wearing a ushanka years ago after Stan told him to ditch it and Bebe overenthusiastically agreed, but that didn’t stop him from feeling self conscious. He tried his best to tame the wild mess of curls on top of his head, waking up early in the morning so it didn’t look like a mop that’s overdue in it’s trashing, but it seemed that poofy and out of control was its natural state anyways._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _He let out a drawn out sigh and flipped onto his side, only allowing his back as a view. _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _“If I was Heidi, all I know is that I wouldn't want to be ignored by you, Cartman,” His words were slurred with weariness from his sleepy state, but he couldn’t care enough to correct it. _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _“I’d want to be acknowledged and appreciated and...”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _The bed sheets rustled a bit and he felt Cartman shift beside him, so he checked over his shoulder to see that he was now sitting up on his elbows, his eyebrows raised and amusement plastered on his face._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _“...What are you staring at?” Kyle rubbed at his eyes, trying to rub away his exhaustion. It didn’t work._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _Cartman shook his head slowly and a sly grin formed on his face. “You know Jew, you talk all this shit about how you wouldn’t touch me with a seven foot pole, but here you are, comparing yourself to my girlfriend. Kind of invalidates your accusations, doesn’t it?” _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _“Uhhh, I’m - I mean…” The implication that was in Cartman’s voice instantly made him all too aware of how his words must have sounded. Whatever he said, it really wasn’t intentional, but at that point it was too late as Cartman already took notice of the fiery red color that was cast upon his cheeks. He put a hand onto his shoulder, and squeezed._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _“No need to be embarrassed, Kyle…” Cartman let out a deep chuckle, and to his horror, shifted his huge stature over so that they were spooning. _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _“...plenty of girls and guys want a piece of me and you are obviously no exception...” Kyle could feel Cartman’s face nuzzled into his neck, the utter softness of him pressed up against his back, and he couldn’t help but wonder why Cartman was even holding him. He was also way too shocked to fight back his assumption. Huh. _Assumption.____ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _Did Cartman already ...know? No… He couldn’t have. But he doubted his thoughts and cursed at himself when he felt his blood rush to two different places very quickly. His head and..., well, yea._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _“What do you think you are doing, asshole?” _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _“Just shut up and go back to sleep…” Cartman groaned sleepily, his warm breath up casting a wet spot onto his neck. Cartman placed a heavy bearing arm onto Kyle’s hip, pulling him closer so that his ass was basically pressed up against his crotch, and what the actual fuck was going on? _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _Kyle attempted to move out of his grip in a state of pure panic, but Cartman just wouldn’t let up. He gave out a sigh of defeat, too tired and way too sleepy and way too _okay_ with this position to even try another time. Not even having enough energy to fight back against his words implying that he was attracted to him… cause it was very true and it made his stomach feel weird and he would rather not acknowledge the growing feeling settling in his chest and in his jeans.___ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _Minutes passed by, and Kyle had finally shoved his fleeting, inappropriate thoughts into the back of his head. Just when he was about to slip off into dreamland again, the raspiness of Cartman’s voice filled the air._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _“Heidi never lets me be the big spoon,” Cartman said lazily._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _“She doesn’t?” Kyle chuckled and shifted slightly in Cartman’s arms. “You’re huge, I don’t understand how that works.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _“I’m huge in more ways than just one, Jew.” _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _Cartman moved closer to Kyle, and as if right on cue, he could feel what he was talking about pressed up against his ass. Shit. _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _It was practically a goddamn miracle that Cartman couldn’t see his face right now, or else he would be confronted about the red color that flamed up his face, not to mention the tent his jeans was pitching. But none of this could be his fault, right? Not when Cartman was the one who decided it was a good idea to spoon him, hint towards attraction on Kyle’s part, basically grind against his ass, and smell fucking great too. _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _Kyle’s eyes wandered the confinements of his room._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _“Cartman, why the hell are you hard right now?” _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _He pulled Kyle closer. “Ever heard of morning wood?” _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _“It isn’t the morning, dumbass,”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _“Pretend that it is.” _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _That was easy for him to say, but putting it into action proved to be much, much more difficult._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _\------------------------------------------------_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _The next day Kyle arrived at school extra early, because he forgot his textbooks in his locker and he can’t be late to biology again. He had planned on going straight to first period to study, but he felt like a deer caught in headlights when he saw Heidi pressed up against Cartman’s locker, his big hands that were on his hips yesterday tangled up in his girlfriend’s chestnut hair. There is a sinking feeling settling in his chest, and oh god, he feels like he is drowning in it until a hand on his shoulder pulls him out of his trance. _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _“Quite the couple, aren't they?” Kenny leaned on the locker that was next to Kyle’s and apparently his staring was obvious as even the clueless mess of a blonde that was Kenny took a hint._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _Kyle doesn’t respond. He doesn't even spare Kenny a glance, just continues staring at the too-passionate of a makeout for it to be in the school hallways. Kenny is completely right though, they really are a picture perfect couple and it makes his stomach twist with irritation and something else too._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _The longer he stares, the more he notices how Heidi’s petite hourglass frame is only heightened when standing next to Cartman, his broad shoulders and long legs and thick arms making Heidi seem even smaller than she already is. His blue eyes complimented her green, sort of like how it does with Kyle, but hers are softer and deeper and now that he mentions it his doesn’t so much compliment — rather sort of clashes with Cartman’s._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _Kyle’s gaze travels down, and he can see that Cartman has one hand slowly inching below her waist, and she is arching her back in a way that only happens when you are being touched and loving it and she is pressing her stomach against his and fucking hell, Kyle doesn’t know why he keeps looking at them but he can’t seem to tear his eyes away._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _“They put on a great show,” Kenny said with a suggestive purr added on to the end of his sentence and Kyle wanted to throw up. It was enough to make him snap out of it._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _“It’s the school hallway, for Christ sake!” _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _Kyle finally averted his eyes and shut his locker with enough force to turn a couple of heads, and he sort of hoped for the metal clang to be loud enough that it stops the ‘show’ but he failed in that regard. _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _“They both need to have some self respect, just for once!” He begins to walk away furiously and Kenny follows right behind, unquestioning and maybe a little bit oblivious but Kyle doesn’t mention it._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _“Hey! There is nothing wrong with getting down and dirty in public! In fact, that’s just the way I like it.” Kenny wiggled his eyebrows and Kyle stops his walk to give him a grossed-out stare._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _“That’s sick, dude. _You_ are sick.” Kyle scoffed. ___ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _“Jesus, in a mood today, Broflovski?”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _“No! I'm just…”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _“...you’re just... jealous?!” Kenny inquires in an amused manner. When Kyle’s face didn't change and he didn't even try to deny it, Kenny looked concerned for a brief moment before he lit up with realization. He threw an arm around Kyle's neck and ruffled his hair, all the while making those noises a kid makes when you find out who your best friend’s crush is._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _The blonde continued to giggle like a child that is high on sugar and lollipops and Kyle finally moved out of his headlock._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _“No! It's just… gross. Inappropriate, and I don’t like it.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _Kenny‘s grin fades away and suddenly his eyebrows are furrowed and now its Kyle’s turn to be confused. _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _“Look man, there is no shame in feeling a lil’ bit of the jealous stuff. It happens to the best of us.” _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _He put a hand on Kyle’s shoulder in a reassuring way but he sure as hell doesn’t feel its effect. Kenny turns around and points a finger at the scene at hand, and scans his eyes up and down. _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _“Especially when Heidi looks that damn good, goddamn.” Kenny wolf whistled and suddenly it made sense._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _Kenny thought he was jealous of Cartman. Any straight guy would be, but Kyle isn’t straight and he might be beginning to realize that and who the fuck would have ever thought that Eric Cartman would be his sexual awakening? Maybe it’s the end of the world._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _It sure feels a whole lot like it after Kyle takes one last look in their direction before beginning to walk away. Kenny slapped his shoulder and started up the conversation again but Kyle didn’t listen. His one-sided dialogue was being drowned out by the ice cold blue eyes that were meeting green, and Kyle wanted nothing more in that moment for those green to be his own. _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _He sighed and continued to walk in the opposite direction, the sinking feeling in his stomach still there and just as heavy._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _


	2. Chapter 2

Kyle doesn't see Cartman again until sixth period.

But apparently that doesn’t stop him from swimming around in his thoughts. Because all day he tried not to think about the how Heidi was practically eating his face off, how Cartman had his hands laced up in her hair and how sloppy the kiss he was. 

What bothered Kyle the most was that they looked good together. They were a poster-board couple that would be on a movie cover for some shitty high school movie where everybody is a fucking 10/10.

And it wasn’t even like Kyle was ugly. Multiple girls had made that way too clear that wasn’t the case. 

The problem was: Cartman could have anybody he fucking wanted. After he grew into his build and stood at a height tall enough to intimidate anybody, girls found him utterly irresistible. He had a bad-boy reputation that was fawned over, and hell, even Kyle understood the appeal.

But the more he thought about it the more his stomach sunk because why the hell would Cartman go for him when he can somebody like Heidi wrapped around his pinky? It made sense in his mind and that frustrated him. He attempts to distract himself with the work assigned to him throughout his periods but he was always the one who finished first and was again, left to his own thoughts that Cartman seemed to occupy always. 

He remembers when he first figured out that maybe the intense feelings he had for Cartman weren't pure hatred. They were fighting in Stan’s basement and Kyle was on top of him, and Cartman looked fucking handsome in a way he shouldn’t have with his beanie sloped off his head and his nose bloody and a shit eating grin on his face. Kyle was snapped out of his thoughts when the deep tell-tale voice greeted him in the tell-tale way.

“Jew.” Cartman acknowledges him nonchalantly as he dumps his bag onto the floor and slumps back into his seat. In some sort of fate of events he was seated right next to Kyle, and he hated that his heart skipped a beat every single time he walked in.

“There any homework due today?”

“Not like you would do it even if there was.” He muttered quietly, his veiled irritation getting the best of him.

Cartman sighed when he was fully situated in his seat and nodded his head approvingly. “You make a good point,” The brunet cracked a smile and Kyle didn't know why his heart skipped a beat whenever he stared into his eyes, but he had a feeling that it had to do with the asshole cuddling up to him and not bothering to hide his erection from sliding in between his ass through denim layers. Not to mention the years of pining. 

He is _so_ fucked.

“So, I’m free tonight,” Cartman continues while taking out his textbook. When Kyle doesn’t bother responding, Cartman perked his head up to meet his stare, and drooped his head.

“This is the part where you invite me over...yada yada yada…” 

He opened his mouth to respond but was promptly cut off by a high-pitched voice.

“Hey Eric! Do ya’ wanna come over to my house today? My mom is baking up some of those cookies that you really like. Soft and underdone, just the way you prefer!” 

Butters must have overheard their conversation, and Kyle shook his head and chuckled. Cartman rolled his eyes and groaned loudly before tucking his head into his crossed arms on the desk.

“_Awhhh, Cartman!_ Soft and underdone?” He teased, reaching over to punch his shoulder. When the brunet made no move to talk, not even bothering to lift his head up, Butters responded for him. 

“Yeah, he says that crunchy cookies hurt his teeth. Don’t want to hurt those fragile chompers, right Eric? Hehe.”

Kyle’s face had a shocked amused expression from Butters’ brutal honesty and Cartman finally took his head out of his arms, only to flip the both of them off with two hands.

“You know what? Fuck off, Butters. Same applies to you, Jewboy.”

Kyle dismissed him with his hand, and Butters suddenly burst out of his seat. “Excuse me fellas, but I need to go to the little boys room before class starts. Be right back!” Kyle watched as Butters gleefully skipped out of the room, and when he no longer saw blue and blonde he returned his gaze to Cartman.

“So, no more makeout sessions scheduled with Turner today?” He prompted quietly as he flipped through his textbook but Cartman apparently heard it no problem. He watched as a toothy grin spread onto his face and felt the familiar anger quickly setting in.

“My, my. Never took you for a watcher but here we are.” Cartman nodded smugly and took the eraser part of his pencil into his mouth.

“I wasn’t staring!” 

Cartman gave him a deadpan look and Kyle slouched his shoulders. 

“I mean, it’s hard _not_ to when you practically committed public indecency back there.” 

“No, that’s fine, Kyle, really. Whatever lets you sleep at night.” Cartman's eyebrows were raised and with his teeth biting into his bottom lip, he didn't look all that convinced. Kyle opened his mouth to argue back but he got interrupted by the substitute starting class. He clamped his mouth shut and gave Cartman an angry look, which only fed into his amusement.

Butters eventually came back, and the entire class spent the rest of the hour-long period in silence, as the sub had strictly enforced much to Cartman’s dismay. Kyle heard him mutter _‘stupid bitch’_ and had to cover his grin.

His desk was a little further back from Cartman’s, so he easily got away with staring at him most of the period. That’s what he did most days anyways. His light brown hair was all rustled up and boyishly messy in the right ways and he hated that it was Heidi’s cause. The bell rang, and as everyone started packing up, Kyle kicked the metal legs of Cartman's desk.

“Mind giving me a ride home? We can order pizza and play Halo, or some...shit like that.”

Cartman looked up from packing his stuff and stared at him. 

“Well, Jew, when you put pizza on the line there really is no other option, is there?

“I guess not.” Kyle grinned and Cartman returned it. The brunet finished packing up his stuff and zipped up his backpack and they both walked out the door, and as they were heading to the parking lot Kyle took out his phone and pulled up his message thread with Stan.

**dont need a ride today but thanks for the offer**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I didn't plan on this OS becoming a multi-chapter, but here we are! It's not gonna be super long or anything, but we will see. :) Please leave a kudos or better yet, a comment if you enjoyed. I read every single one!! Hope you enjoyed and stay tuned <3


	3. Chapter 3

They made it to Kyle’s front yard without crashing the car, thank god, but that’s not to say that almost didn't happen multiple times throughout the ride (he really didn’t know why he expected anything else). On the way home though, they didn’t get pizza thanks to Kyle’s reasoning and instead stopped at the local hamburger joint and took it home in cheap styrofoam boxes. And much to Kyle’s dismay, Cartman wanted to dig into his food on his bed. As he so wisely put it, ‘the softness of the bed heightens the experience’. So there they were, sitting shoulder to shoulder against the wall side of his mattress, and burgers and fries in their lap.

They ate in silence, a comfortable one that was only slightly altered by the soft music flowing out of Cartman’s speaker that he spent way too much money on, playing the Pixies and occasional Beatles. As much as Cartman would hate to admit it, him and Stan were very similar. 

They’re both fiercely loyal, like a love-sick puppy that doesn’t leave your side even though you might want it to. Both are also very smart in their respective ways, Stan in a more conventional one, and maybe that’s why they both were very prominent parts of his live. Oh, and Cartman also secretly liked ‘hippie’ music. Go figure.

Kyle looked over to see that Cartman had stopped eating, and was now staring at him without a hint of expression. He stopped his chewing to stare back.

“...What? Is there ketchup on my face?” Kyle brought a hand up to his cheek to check, and in a one swift movement Cartman darted his arm out to steal some of Kyle’s fries. 

“Dude, what the hell, you haven’t even touched your fries, back off!” In a beat, Kyle grabbed his foam box and moved it to the side Cartman wasn’t on, shielding it with his arm as Cartman still tried to grab at his plate.

The brunet gave up with a sigh and shook his head in dissatisfaction. “Such a whiny bitch. It’s called being smart, Kyle, get with it.”

Kyle scoffed and took another bite of his plain burger when he figured it was safe to eat again. He covered his mouth with his hand to cover his chewing as he spoke. “Remind me why stealing my fries is being smart, asshole.”

Cartman shoved multiple into his mouth, talking around his mouthful. “Well, this is really just easy math. By stealing your fries right now, I get to have mine plus some. Basic logistics here, Jew, come on.”

“You are pathetic. You do know this, right?”

He continued in that fake smart tone.

“I’d say that your statement is wrong for many reasons. First being that you asked for a ride home, so obviously I'm not pathetic to you. Second being that you practically made a scene dramatic enough for reality TV to get some damn burgers and not pizza, so I’d say if anybody here is pathetic, it’s you. Case and point.” Cartman finished off the last bite of his hamburger.

“Also, I paid for your meal, you ungrateful bitch.” He said, pointing to the half-eaten tray in his lap.

“Shut up,” Kyle rolled his eyes at his false smart demeanor. “I always pay you back!”

“But right now you are indebted to me so suck on that.” 

Kyle shook his head contently and smiled to himself. It was still hard to believe how quickly the dynamic of their relationship had changed. They went from enemies of the worst kind to sort of best-friends in the matter of a couple of months. You could imagine the type of stares they got when the walked down the hallway, not throwing punches at each other or spitting insults like they usually did, but instead laughing loudly and playfully shoving at each others shoulder. Stan and Kenny weren’t all that surprised, Stan just shrugged when Kyle instead sat next to Cartman on the bus to the school, and Kenny said something along the lines of _‘it had to happen sooner or later’_ and Kyle wasn’t exactly sure what he meant by that.

“Why did you first ask me to hang out?” Kyle blurted out before he could stop the words from spilling out of his mouth.

“Hmm?” Cartman asked as he met Kyle’s eyes, pausing the doodle he was doing with a single fry and some leftover ketchup.

“That day afterschool. You walked up to me when I was doing my homework and you wanted to come over to my house. Why did you do that?”

Cartman stared for a couple of seconds, an emotion pooling in his eyes that Kyle couldn't quite decipher before his face flushed and he glanced away.

“Uhh, I don’t know. You looked like a fucking loser sitting all by yourself, Broflovski. Just thought you might have wanted some company.”

Kyle nodded slowly, his eyebrows knitting together. “Okay… but what about after that? I was talking with Craig and Clyde and you wanted to come over again.”

“Geez, am I being interrogated here?” Cartman pulled at the collar of his shirt. “I bet you’re trying to get inside my brain or some sneaky Jew shit like that.” He put his index to Kyle’s forehead and pushed. Kyle swatted his finger away.

“No! I’m just...curious, I guess.”

“Well, I’m curious about a lot of things too but I don’t go probing around in business that isn’t mine.” 

Kyle stayed silent this time.

He examined Cartman’s face as he stared down at his empty tray. His dark, thick eyelashes were almost touching his cheeks, which looked sort of flustered and pale now that he was staring. Cartman’s long brown hair covered most of his forehead and framed his face in overly charming way that he knew way too well, and Kyle’s eyes trailed down further down his face, lowering to his lips that were pink and plush and all kinds of perfect.

“Can’t say I’m surprised, though. You _are_ a Jew and it’s just in your nature to be nosy. Ha! Get it? Cause of your big no-” 

Kyle didn't know why he did it. He always sucked at timing, being that he decided to go for it in the middle of an insult. But he did it nonetheless, crashing his lips against his, brows furrowed and not moving a single inch like he was testing the waters to see if Cartman would pull away but he didn’t. 

Kyle didn’t know what he was expecting but it definitely wasn’t this, because Cartman’s lips were so soft and the complete opposite of what he _should_ feel like. He hesitantly brought his hand up and snaked it around the back of Cartman’s neck, which was hot to the touch and he could feel the larger boy tremble beneath his fingertips. 

An intense fire burned inside his chest, consuming him with every passing second when both of their lips began to slowly move, hesitantly and easily and yeah, Kyle can die right now and be happy. When he laid awake at night wondering how Cartman would be… in this way, he always imagined him to be sloppy and messy, and he guessed that was half-true seeing the Heidi situation. But right now that couldn’t be farther from the truth in his books, not when Cartman’s lips intertwined and locked with his in a such a gentle manner, as if he went too rough Kyle might shatter like fragile glass. 

Cartman threaded his index fingers into his jean’s belt loop and tugged, so Kyle took that as a cew to shift his leg over to straddle him. Cartman let out a low moan that melted into his mouth as Kyle tangled a hand in his hair that felt soft to the touch: A common theme. Soft. Everywhere. His hair, hands, lips, stomach, _everything_ was so soft and Kyle didn’t think he had ever been more achingly hard.

He moved lower, planting sloppy kisses along Cartman’s jaw, trailing down to his neck. He licked a trail down his adams apple, choosing a spot and sucking softly. He was out of breath from just sheer tension and he inhaled Cartman's overbearing cologne, a scent that was musky and masculine which would have been headache inducing had it been anyone else but right now it was overbearing in all the right ways. This was _right._

“Nngh, _Kyle…”_ Cartman moaned softly. His half-lidded eyes widened a fraction. 

“Kyle. Kyle?!” 

He felt a push on his shoulder and could tell something was very off. The way Cartman said his name like it was some sort of slur on his tongue felt like a direct stab to the chest, cutting deeper than any insults he threw at him throughout the years, and before he knew it he was being completely pushed off his lap and Cartman practically scrambled off the bed. 

Kyle was confused and silently panicking now because Cartman was eerily silent, standing in the middle of his room with his back as a view and both hands covering his face and Kyle swore he could hear his heart pounding through his chest, a mournful reminder that this was all too real.

Finally, after what felt like an eternity, Cartman turned around and snapped.

“I have a fucking _girlfriend!_” 

Kyle felt a rush of shame through his veins and maybe even guilt, before he remembered that he kissed him _back._ His knuckles turned white from gripping his bedsheets too hard.

“Don’t even get me started on that shit, Cartman.”

“You _kissed_ me!”

“And you kissed me back, asshole! This isn’t just my fault, so quit acting like it is!”

“Oh God, what am I gonna do?” Cartman whispered to himself and Kyle dryly swallowed but that didn't do shit to get rid of the frog in his throat.

Cartman ran a hand through his hair, looking deep in thought. Kyle didn’t think it can get any worse, but it was like the universe laughed in his face when Cartman’s face lit up like he had an epiphany. His heart dropped down to his stomach.

He shoved an intruding finger in Kyle’s face. “You are such a fucking sneaky Jew!”

“Huh?” Kyle’s brow furrowed and his mouth dropped open.

“You… you’re trying to break me and Heidi up, right? This was your little plan all along, wasn’t it?

“The hell are you talking about, asshole?”

Cartman continued. “I found someone...and you saw that as an opportunity to take it away! Now you are gonna run your mouth to her that we kissed and she is gonna break up with me! God, I should have expected this. I’m an _idiot!_” It was Kyle’s turn to be angry.

“Do you really think that I would do that?” He slid off the bed and walked up to Cartman. His expression didn’t change and Kyle’s blood boiled, hot and searing and burning his skin all over.

“You are the biggest fucking asshole in this town and you can pretend all you want but you haven’t changed shit! You are still just as much as a douchebag as you were back then and you are just as stupid now! Fuck you and fuck your accusations and fuck your girlfriend. I don’t need this shit, not anymore.”

The expression on Cartman’s face softened a little. He saw pity in his eyes and that fueled his anger even more. “Kyle…”

“No! And you know what? You are right! You are an idiot! ‘Cause I’ve had the biggest fucking crush on you for three fucking years now and you haven’t noticed and instead decide to run off with Turner! Do you even know how shitty that makes me feel? That you chose that balloon headed bitch, when you could have anyone you fucking want?”

Kyle resented the stinging in his eyes because this couldn’t have gone any worse and he would have much rather preferred if the kiss hadn’t happened at all. Maybe if it hadn't, he could have slowly forgotten about his feelings that were suffocating him now, could have distracted himself with other things, _anything_, but deep down he knew that was impossible because this was Cartman he was talking about.

It had always been Cartman.

The taller boy reached out to put a hand on his shoulder but Kyle turned his back on him and sniffled loudly, because he was full-fledged crying now, hot tears falling onto his cheeks and sloping down his neck.

“I… I think you should go.”

“But…”

“I said go!”

Even though Kyle told him to do so, his heart panged with disappointment and hurt and longing when he heard retreating footsteps, and his front door slamming shut.


	4. Chapter 4

It’s been an entire week and Kyle was tired. Really tired. The past few days have been nothing but a cycle between Cartman trying painfully hard to talk to him the second they are alone, and when _anybody_ came around, outright ignoring him.

It was lunchtime and he really couldn’t help but wince when he saw Cartman approaching with no one but his food tray. He kept his eyes glued to his chicken sandwich, though he could still see in his peripheral view Cartman taking the seat right across from him. He sets his tray down and stares at him.

“Kyle.”

He kept his eyes averted. 

“Kyle, would you quit ignoring me?”

He dropped his chicken sandwich with force, finally snapping. 

“That's funny coming from you. You frantically try talking to me when we’re alone but the second someone comes, it’s like I'm not even there. You don’t even look at me!”

Cartman leaned in close and spoke in a loud-whisper. “I’m scared, alright!?”

“Of what?” 

“In case you haven’t noticed, I still have a girlfriend. And if this gets out…”

“I wouldn’t do that. You think I’d do that?”

Cartman looked at him like it was the most obvious thing in the world. “Uhhh, yeah?”

“You’re fucking stupid.”

And it wasn’t even like Kyle could lie and say that his feelings for Cartman just suddenly dissipated after his asshole freak-out. If that were the case, this wouldn’t even be an issue. But is still stung when he looked into his eyes or when he passed him and Heidi in the halls.

Kyle sighed and shook his head, returning back to his chicken sandwich when he sees Stan and Wendy fast approaching.

“They’re coming so you can get back to ignoring me, asswipe.” Pity clouded Cartman’s blue eyes and Kyle felt like he was being suffocated by the intensity of very different emotions all at once.

“Hey guys.” Stan greeted as he sat down next to Kyle. Wendy took her seat next to Cartman and when she saw him picking at his spaghetti and meatballs, she got a very worried expression on her face.

“Hey… are you alright, Cartman?” She reached out and touched his arm. Cartman didn’t try moving away like he usually did.

“Why wouldn’t I be?” He responded, not meeting her eyes and stirring his food around with his fork.

“I was just asking, you look frustrated. Are you having trouble with math again? I told Stan I could tuto-”

“I’m fine!” Cartman threw his fork down at his tray. He then stood up, and began to gather his lunch and after, pulled his backpack straps over his shoulders.

He locked eyes with Kyle as he said, “Completely fine…” before storming away, shoving Kenny with his arm on the way out.

Kenny watched, confused and his gaze lingering before turning back to the table and replacing Cartman’s seat.

“Trouble in paradise, Kyle?” Kenny asked with a chuckle and his heart dropped.

“What do you mean by that?” His eyebrows furrowed.

Kenny looked at him with widened eyes for a few seconds, not expecting his serious tone. 

“It was just a joke, Broflovski, chill out. Did you and Cartman sync up or something?”

Kyle glared at him for a few seconds before shaking his head. “Fuck this.” He too, picked up his tray and untangled himself from the table.

“Dude, where are you going!?” Kenny called out to Kyle, who was already halfway out of the cafeteria. He didn’t bother responding.

————————————

“This is stupid.” Kyle took the remote and turned the TV off.

“Yea, I know.” Stan agreed. It was 9 P.M on a Wednesday night and Kyle invited him over because the deafening silence that crowded his house was killing him and being left alone with his thoughts wasn’t such a great idea. 

He wasn’t really planning on spilling his boy problems to Stan, especially because he wasn’t even aware of the ‘thing’ he had with Cartman, but with nothing else on his brain and the shitty day talk they were having it was practically inevitable.

“What’s wrong, man? Why did you snap like that yesterday?”

“I kissed someone.”

Stan drooped his head. “That’s good!”

“They are taken, though.”

“Okay, not so good.”

“It was Cartman. I kissed Cartman.” He was staring straight ahead, the black flat screen suddenly very interesting. When the silence went on for too long though, he turned his head to look over at Stan expecting a shocked expression, and to not find one was kinda worse than the former.

“I... can’t really say I’m surprised.” 

Kyle furrowed his eyebrows. “Wait, what?”

Stan slowly nodded. “It makes sense now that I think about it. Geez, how did I not notice before? Kenny totally called it.”

“Yeah, well. It’s not like things are going well so maybe Kenny’s wrong.”

“Oh shit, yeah. How did he react?”

“Cartman blew up. Started freaking out and then blamed me for trying to break him and Heidi up. Then he continued to ignore me around you guys and tried talking to me the second you guys left. It’s been confusing.”

Stan hummed, looking deep in thought with his hand holding his chin up.

“So...what should I do?” Kyle asked.

“That’s tough. I mean, Cartman should not have reacted like that but at the same time, I get where he is coming from? I don’t know, but please don’t make me pick sides.”

Kyle turned his head to the side, slightly offended. “I wouldn’t do that.”

Stan cracked a smile. “Yeah, I know.”

He felt a bit better, Stan had been a source of comfort for years and has been the most consistent thing in his life so far. Nothing really new, there.

It was silently decided that it was time for Stan to leave, both of them getting up the couch at the same time. Kyle walked Stan to the door after he slung his book bag on his shoulder.

He leaned on the doorway, arms crossed and head tilted. “Still picking me up tomorrow? Both of my parents work.”

“Of course, dude.”

Kyle smiled. “Thanks for listening to me rant to you. I know it’s gay or whatever.

“Don’t give me that shit, Kyle. You’re my best friend, you can use me as a human punching bag for all I care.”

“You know, one of these days I might take you up on that offer. Cartman’s a real pain in the ass.”

Stan chuckled. “Don’t need to tell me twice.” He held a hand out as to wave goodbye and Kyle did the same. He began walking to his car.

“Don’t be late again tomorrow!”

“I know!” Stan yelled out, back still turned as he climbed into the driver's seat. He waited until Stan drove off before sighing and going back inside.

Kyle softly shut the door. He leaned his forehead against it with an audible thud and groaned. Ugh.


	5. Chapter 5

Mornings for the Broflovskis were quiet, calm. Sheila was usually docile during the early hours, her temper flaring as the time on the clock ticked along. Gerald went right to his office as soon as the sun flooded his room and Ike was always sleeping over at a friends. Kyle didn’t mind. He welcomed the silence and peace with open arms. The drip of his coffee brewing and the low jazz he played in the background prepared him to take on the day. 

However, he did not wake up to his alarm ringing. He instead had the pleasure of waking up to Stan’s ringtone blaring out of his phone’s speakers at full volume.

Five missed calls. _Shit. _

Kyle can’t be late, not again. Sheila rained hell on him for the past few weeks for not arriving on time. He quickly rummaged through his drawers, threw on whatever he could get his hands on, grabbed his book bag off the couch and flew out the door, ignoring his mother’s farewells. 

Stan’s car was waiting on the side street, so Kyle opened the car door and threw himself in the back. He wasn't surprised to see Kenny was knocked out, drool leaking out his mouth and onto his sweater, only jumping awake at the sound of his alarmed voice.

“Go, go, go! We’re gonna be late, Stan!” If there was one thing Kyle didn’t want today, it was Sheila’s wrath. He wasn't really in the mood to get his eardrums blown out. Stan began driving, finally, but a tiny bit too slow for Kyle if you asked him.

“I think it’s a bit late for that, dude. And besides, we still need to pick up Cartman.”

“Cartman??”

“Yeah.”

“Why on earth are we doing that?”

“Because I promised him a ride! We are gonna be late anyways, it isn’t a big deal.” Stan glanced at him quickly, and Kyle can see the sympathy pooling in his eyes, which didn’t do anything to lift his already shitty mood. He banged his head against the window, already feeling the irritation creep up his throat. It was way too early to deal with this shit now.

A couple of minutes passed by with nothing but Kenny’s inconsistent hum of_ ‘Careless Whisper’,_ and Cartman’s house _finally_ came into view. It was an expensive pine green model, well kept and remodeled after Liane picked up the slack (which earned Cartman a wealthy stepdad). Their front lawn was dusted with snow but Kyle could still see the freshly shaven grass underneath the white. He didn’t even know why he examined his house so carefully. It was probably because it’s been a while since he’s seen it. He ignores the tightness in his chest.

It was then the front door opens, so naturally his eyes track over Cartman. Almost immediately a warm pink flared up on his face, because Cartman looked good and that fucking sucked when he still had internalized anger building inside. Kyle clears his throat when Cartman pulls on the car door handle.

“I am _so_ tired.” Cartman took his sweet time to situate himself. But by standing outside, he was letting all the freezing air in, which of course caused Kyle’s temper to flare up.

“Get in and shut the door behind you, fatass.” 

All three of their eyes switched over to him from the unexpected aggressiveness laced in his voice. 

“It’s been five seconds, Jew, calm down.” 

“Just get in.” Stan furrowed his eyebrows, still glaring at Kyle and sounding defeated. Cartman rolled his eyes but listened, finally sitting down and shutting the car door. They were on their way.

“Look, I have no idea what is going on with you guys but its Friday, and you know what that means.” 

“You are such a whore, Jesus Christ.” Cartman shook his head, keeping his eyes on the road ahead of him.

“I don’t mean _that._ Butters is visiting his grandparents, so unfortunately I’m not getting laid tonight.”

Gross. That was way too much information that he needed to know. Kenny noticed his disgusted staring.

“Have any plans today, Kyle?” The blonde reached over to punch his shoulder. Kyle shifted uncomfortably in his seat, the tension in the car putting him on edge.

“No, I don’t.”

“Okay, lets go over to Stan’s house then. I’ll bring the beer, you bring some KFC, and...Cartman? What are you bringing?”

“You’re stupid if you think I’m going.” 

Kenny slumped his shoulders and whined. “But why?” He drags out the last word, annoying and high pitched. Kyle wants to bang his head against the window a second time.

“I have better things to do with my time.”

Kyle scoffed. He turned his head to the window, hoping the outside snow scenery would distract him. But when he was annoyed with literally everything about this situation, distracting himself seemed impossible. “Yeah right.”

Cartman shifted his head to look at him over his shoulders. “Like you can talk, Jew.”

“The hell is that supposed to mean?”

“All you do is study and sleep. That’s it.”

“At least I don’t eat everything in sight like you do.”

“Would you guys please calm down? It’s 7 A.M.” Stan asked.

“You _both_ are no fun.” Kenny murmured and shifts his body toward his window.

The rest of the car trip was spent in silence, up until they finally pulled up the front of the school. Stan parked the car, locked it after everyone was out, and started walking in the opposite direction without saying any sort of goodbye. He immediately sparked up a new conversation with Kenny.

“Bye, asshole…” Kyle whispers to himself, shoving his hands in his pockets from the cold Colorado air. He thought he was walking alone until he heard a second pair of footsteps crunching the thin layer of snow. He turned his head to the side to see Cartman staring straight ahead, not bothering to look him in the eyes, a little farther behind him. Kyle groaned and averted his gaze.

“You are one angry son of a bitch.” Cartman breathed out, a cloud of breath appearing and fading just as quickly.

“Yeah, well. It’s not like I care if I hurt your feelings.”

“Pfft.” Cartman looked amused, with a single eyebrow raised. His thick arms were shoved into the pockets of his jeans and the tip of his nose was red, presumably from the cold. Kyle want to pinch himself when he felt butterflies building in the bottom of his stomach.

“What?”

“Oh, nothing. Except what you just said is a complete lie.”

“No it’s not, asshole.”

“Yeah, sure, Kyle.”

He internally cursed at himself for finding this interaction… enjoyable. Something was seriously wrong with him if he missed the mindless bickering with Cartman. Fuck. 

The crunch of the snow is the only sound between them. It’s deafening yet too quiet at the same time and it’s driving him insane. In his head though Kyle keeps secretly hoping that Cartman will say something, _anything_ that he can fight back on but it doesn’t happen. They instead reach their classes which are right next to each other.

Cartman opens his respective door and walks into his class nonchalantly, looking like he doesn’t have a care in the world. Kyle walks into his own, sits down, and tries to keep his mind off the one person who really shouldn’t be there.

——————

The bell rings throughout the school and Kyle quickly walks out of his class to avoid that asshole that distracted him from his classwork all first period. He instead speed-walks to where Stan’s class was, not that far away.

Stan’s face lit up when he saw him leaning on the door frame.

“Hey, dude.” 

Kyle smiled as a response. “Hey. Where’s Wendy? I didn’t see her in first.”

“She’s down with the flu. She couldn’t even get up from her bed, and last night I had to hold a bucket up to her face.”

“Damn. That sucks.”

“Yeah, it does. School without her feels...shitty, y’know? It just doesn’t feel right without her.”

Kyle cursed at his mind for immediately going to Cartman. Ever since that stupid kiss, things have been anything but normal, and his routine was completely thrown off the status quo. He was used to heading to Cartman’s house everyday after school and to go home to an empty house now almost felt symbolic in the shittiest way possible.

“Yeah, I get it.”

Stan looked his way with pursed lips and his eyebrows furrowed. Apparently, he was easy to read. “Things haven’t been going so well with Cartman, huh.”

Kyle slumps his shoulders and runs a hand through his curls. “I mean, him being an asshole hasn’t changed much. It’s just… it’s different now. I feel like I can’t forgive him too soon or else he wont learn his lesson but _fuck._ I can’t believe I miss him.”

Stan sighs and wraps his arms around Kyle’s neck, pulling him close to his chest as they walk to their second period.

“It’s so fucking weird, Stan! He is still around me or whatever, but he acts like a different person.”

“Things will get better, Kyle, trust me. You just need to give it some time.” 

“I hope so.” Stan releases his embrace and waves goodbye when they reached his class. Kyle waves back and parts to his own. 

As he walks to Spanish, he can feel his stomach already turning, which is weird. Confrontation had never bothered him before. He has always considered himself to be bold and unafraid to speak his mind. But Cartman had always been a weak spot. _Cartman_, of all people. It was like the universe laughed in his face every time his heart thumped out of his chest from a conversation with him.

Kyle’s hands are clammy and warm as he pulls open the steel door and walks into the classroom, his eyes immediately going to Cartman although he literally told himself not to do that. The brunet catches his gaze and holds it, both of their faces expressionless and stone-cold.

_Keep your head up. Why are you nervous? Don’t be nervous. _

Kyle averts his gaze and slips into his seat as subtly as he could and by the time he is fully situated he can practically feel Cartman’s gaze burning into his back. The school bell goes off and class starts which causes Kyle to breathe a sigh of relief. A conversation with that asshole is really not what he needs, not when he would probably stumble over his words and sound stupider than he already feels. Is that even possible at this point?

“Hola clase! ¿Como estan?”

At the front of the class was a little mexican lady in her late 50’s, fire-tempered but sweet nonetheless. Her and Kyle had an okay relationship. He half-resented the fact that Mrs. Alvidrez had taken a liking to Cartman who spoke the language fluently and beautifully. The words rolled off his tongue like it was his native language and Kyle didn’t know what bothered him more: The fact that he was better than him at something or that he found it incredibly hot.

Him finding it hot, however, didn’t stop his eyes from rolling whenever he heard the two of them having a full-blown conversation about whatever Cartman can seduce her into. 

There was scattered disinterested moans and some half-assed responses to her greeting. It was no surprise that Cartman was the show off.

“Hola Senora. Te ves tan _joven_ como siempre.”

Kyle turns his head to see Cartman with a devious smirk on his face. Ugh. 

“Ayyyy, Gracias, mijo! On with the class. We have been working with grammar and conjugations for a while now, and I think it’s time to put it into use. I am going to be assigning partners and you will be working together to create a poster on randomly assigned tenses.”

She walks over to her desk and pulls out a sheet of prewritten names. Mrs. Alvidrez begins naming off pairs. She reads off the list until she is down to the last six people in the class.

“...Donovan and Black...Tucker and Valmer...” 

Oh fuck. Kyle feels the dread building in his stomach. 

“Aannnd, Broflovski and Cartman!”

_Fucking hell._ Kyle bangs his head against his desk. He doesn’t even bother searching for Cartman’s reaction. 

“Okay, go ahead and get started! I will be coming around and assigning you tenses. Make sure you exchange contact information with your partner.”

The class erupted in talk as everyone shifted their desks over to face their partners. Kyle meanwhile, wasn’t sure why but felt like he just lost an unspoken battle. Then he feels multiple kicks on the metal legs of his desk.

“Looks like we are going to be working together, eh’?” 

Kyle turns around in his seat. “Fuck no. I’m gonna ask for a partner change.”

“Really? That would be a shame. Especially because I’m probably the best spanish speaker in this class.”

“Your ego is way too high for how much of an asshole you are.”

“Egos have nothing to do with it, Kyle. Neither does ‘how much of an asshole’ I am. What matters, though, is that I’m the best partner you’re gonna get so might as well not make a big deal out of it.”

Kyle paused, trying to come up with anything to retort back. “Why do you even want to work with me?” 

Cartman leaned back in his seat and tapped his pencil on his desk. “We used to be good friends. So could you not make a bitch-fit?”

“Fuck you.”

“Yeah, yeah. My house or yours?”

“Excuse me?”

“Well we are gonna need to make this shit work, right?”

“We can do this here.”

“Oh, come on. Mrs. Alvidrez never gives us the amount of time we need. Might as well put a little extra effort to get that A+.”

“I’m not going over to your house.”

“Okay. So yours at eight?”

Kyle debated in his head. Sheila was already on his ass about the B- he got on last week's quiz, so could he really afford a bad grade on this project too? Goddamnit. 

“Fine.”

——————

At around 7:30, Kyle hears a knock at the door and he drags himself downstairs to open it. Standing on his dimly lit front porch is Cartman, with a big poster board and supplies crowded in his arms. Kyle begrudgingly steps aside to let him in.

“Jewboy.”

“Fatass.” Kyle deadpans.

“So, where are we doing this?”

Kyle pauses to look around his living room, which is pretty damn dirty. Sheila had been working all day and hasn’t had a chance to tidy up. “My room, I guess.”

The redhead wordlessly walks up his staircase and into his room and Cartman follows right behind. _Please don’t make this weird,_ Kyle thinks. Because if anyone can make this situation any more awkward, it was Eric Cartman.

“Been a while since I’ve been in _‘la casa de Broflovski.’”_

Yup, there it was. “You’ve officially made this weird.” He scoffs, shuffling through his backpack that was situated on his chair, looking for the assignment paper.

“What? I’m just pointing out the obvious.”

“Yeah, well, nobody asked.”

“No need to be rude…” Cartman said to himself more than Kyle as he deposited all the materials he brought with him onto the navy blue sheets on his bed. Kyle read off the crumbled paper. 

“Okay.. so she assigned us preterite tense. And I’m kind of clueless on this shit so maybe you can take the lead?”

“Goddammit. I thought your smart ass was gonna carry me through this.” Kyle skips past his bullshit.

“You are practically a native speaker!” 

“Doesn’t mean I want to do actual work!”

Kyle sighed, grabbing the poster off his bed and laying it flat on the floor. He uncaps the black sharpie. “Fine. At least tell me what to write down.”

“Deal.”

He gets on his knees and begins to write, the sharpie making a sound as it scraped against the paper. Kyle was caught off guard when Cartman joined him on the floor, hovering over his shoulder to watch him work. Kyle’s heart was beating impossibly fast as he felt the larger boy’s breath on his neck, his eyes glued to his hands. 

Unsurprisingly, Kyle found it sorta difficult to concentrate on the task at hand when all he could think about was the way their arms were pressing together and how the edges of their knees were touching and how their heat was transferring.

“Um, okay. So what else do I write?” Kyle looks up from the poster to catch Cartman staring right at him, which seemed to catch him off guard. 

“Oh. Yeah, just make a chart right there.”

Kyle nodded and did what he was told. The silence might kill him, which causes him to let his mouth run while he mindlessly wrote. 

“So...how are things going with Heidi?” Kyle’s breath gets caught in his throat when a flash of emotion appears on Cartman's face before he furrowed his eyebrows.

“It’s fine. Everything's fine.”

“That’s good.”

“Yeah.” They both clear their throat at the same time and Kyle sort of wants to die. He opens his mouth to change the subject but is cut off.

“I’m sorry.” Cartman says. Kyle stops writing to look him in the eye. He hasn’t been this close to his face since...well, yeah. But his blue eyes are dark and deeper than he remembers and fuck, Kyle could barely choke out his words. “For what?”

“For making a scene when we- um, you kissed me. That was...a dick move.” 

Kyle thought about pinching himself because was this a fucking dream? Was Eric Cartman actually apologizing? The logical side of his brain decided against that and just rolled with the conversation. 

“Oh. Yeah. It was.” 

He averted his eyes to the bright green poster in front of them. If he looked Cartman in the eye again he would surely pass out from the overwhelming storm of emotions brewing inside his brain.

“I’m sorry I even did that, by the way. I really shouldn’t have. You’re taken.”

Cartman nodded slowly. “All is good in the hood, yo.” His voice nearly cracked at the end, and his tone of voice certainly did not do the expression justice. Kyle felt like he could burst out laughing any second now because of how absurd this conversation was.

He shook his head and stared down at the mostly empty poster. “I have no idea what I’m doing.” 

Kyle is taken by surprise when Cartman grabs the sharpie out of his hand and begins to write spanish conjugations down. 

“You were supposed to be the smart one. Pickin up your slack, aren’t I, Jew?” Cartman grinned.

“Shut the fuck up.” Kyle said halfheartedly, shoving Cartman’s shoulder with his body. They both let out a genuine laugh, and for the first time in a while, things felt normal and in place.


	6. Chapter 6

The Spanish poster sat, half finished and untouched in the middle of Kyle’s bedroom floor, only partially filled with conjugations. It was practically inevitable to be abandoned and out of mind the second Cartman insulted his poor handwriting with a killer smirk. Kyle immediately fed into the fire he ignited, and things just sorta clicked.

The following conversation felt as natural as breathing, like they haven’t been ignoring each other for the past few weeks. Kyle didn’t mind sitting on the floor, both of them leaned up against the edge of his bed and talking, catching up. It didn’t feel forced at all, they picked up right where they left it. But like how the sun comes up every morning, Cartman announcing his hunger was no surprise.

“I’m for real gonna starve.” He puts his large hand on his gut and frowned, staring at Kyle as if he was waiting for him to do something.

“You act like I care.”

“You are going to when I raid your fridge.” Cartman wore a grin and his dark eyebrows were raised like it was a challenge and Kyle could try all he wants to resist but he always gives right into his game.

“I’d like to see you try.” 

Cartman is heavy, but certainly not slow, and Kyle had certainly forgot. It was startling how fast Cartman picked himself up off the ground. Kyle instantly shot up as well to chase him, and scoffed when Cartman grabbed the back part of his rolling chair and slid it over his doorway as to slow him down. 

“BYE FUCKER!” He yelled out as he headed down the staircase. Kyle rolled his eyes as he easily shoved it out the way and sprinted down the steps, right at the hair at Cartman’s neck. 

But with the head start that he had and the little stunt he pulled, Cartman reached the fridge first, smacked the belly of it, and shouted in triumph that was really not necessary at all. 

“WOO! I got here first. Finders, keepers, Jew.” Cartman breathed out, his chest rising up and down.

Kyle ran a hand through his hair, panting as well. “This isn’t how this works. This is _my_ fridge.” Kyle said, pointing to it.

“And you lost the race! Don’t be a sore loser, dude, that’s weak.”

Kyle rolled his eyes and leaned back on his kitchen island with crossed arms. “Fine. Whatever. Just don’t take everything. I know you would if you could.”

“You know me so well.” Cartman cooed with a sickly sweet smile plastered on his face. Arrogant asshole.

Kyle shook his head as he could do nothing but watch Cartman rummage through his fridge, which strangely resembled a beast that hasn’t eaten all winter that just finally got the sight of food. Then he was caught off guard when Cartman stopped in his tracks and shot his head up toward him with an amazed look on his face.

“What?”

“I did _not_ know the Broflovski’s like to _part-aaay!”_

It was then Cartman pulled out a six pack of _really_ strong beer that Kyle didn’t even know existed until now out of his fridge. He was in awe admittedly, and it only kept building when Cartman proceeded to shove multiple cans into his chest and rummage through his fridge to find more.

Kyle took one can out of the pile and closely examined it, his eyes widening when he saw the high alcohol content. “Dude. I didn’t even know my mom bought these.”

“I need to hangout with Sheila someday.” Cartman commented, his voice far since his head was still in the fridge. He took his head out and nodded. “That would be a good time.” 

Kyle’s face contorted with disgust. “Gross. Don’t say that.”

Cartman took out what seemed like the last of the beer and took a deep breath as he turned back to him. “Looks like we are gonna have fun tonight.”

“There is no fucking way. What we are gonna do is put these back.” Kyle moved toward the fridge to do just that but Cartman’s hand on his chest stopped him.

“Kyle. Seriously, don’t be killin’ my vibe right now.” Cartman shut the refrigerator door with his foot, went to the cabinet for a few snacks, then placed a hand on Kyle’s shoulder.

“We are gonna have fun, okay, cause’ that’s what teenagers do. Have you heard of the word? Need a definition?” He said in a patronizing voice and Kyle hated that he felt like a stuck up even though he knew this was wrong.

“Fuck off.” 

Cartman feigned a deep-in-thought look then muttered, “Hmm… how about, no?” 

Kyle groaned and followed Cartman into his living room. Once that bastard had his heart set on something, there was no point in trying to interfere.

They crashed on the couch and Kyle watched with a worried expression as Cartman cracked one open with an admittedly satisfying sizzle.

“Where is your mom, anyways?” Cartman asked in between gulps of beer.

Kyle hesitates when he opens his. He feels like an amateur when he cringes at the strong and certainly not pleasant smell. “She’s working late shifts. So is my dad. I’ve had the house all to myself lately.” 

He takes a tiny sip of beer and nearly gags.

Cartman chuckles, shakes his head, and goes back to his beer. An hour passes by quickly, more so than expected, and by then his coffee table was littered with empty aluminum. The sensation of drunkenness was something Kyle was not familiar with but at the same time not entirely new. Stan and Kenny offered him red cups at parties, Kyle would hesitantly accept it, take a sip or two, then dump it in the grass cause he was almost always the designated driver. 

But right now nothing was holding him back, and he felt a strange need to keep up with Cartman who was downing his drinks left and right. After about three, his head felt like he was in the clouds and he could barely comprehend his own word vomit.

At some point Cartman had turned on the television and switched it to Netflix. The alcohol made him hyper aware and Kyle could feel Cartman’s leg pressed against his as they watched some show he didn’t even recognize on their TV. 

With the help of liquid courage, Kyle had moved a single leg so that it drooped in between Cartman’s lap in his drunken stupor. The smell of beer crowded his living room but at this point Kyle couldn’t bring himself to care.

“This movie fucking _sucks!_ Somebody needs to seriously stop Netflix.” He slurred out. He was on his fourth beer now, and it definitely started to affect the way he acted.__

_ _“You think so?”_ _

_ _“Hell yeah. They are so shitty. I have some advice for them.”_ _

_ _“Enlighten me.”_ _

_ _“Dear Netflix, please make your movies… less shit.”_ _

_ _Cartman looked amused. “Poetic justice, right there. Really, Jew, you never fail to impress me.”_ _

_ _Kyle punched his shoulder with as much strength he could muster (which wasn’t a lot) and smiled as he bit into his bottom lip, returning his attention back to the TV screen. He had gotten engrossed in the show even though it sucked, and that had his attention for a while, but then Cartman’s hand found his thigh. Kyle couldn’t say how long It’s been there, it could have been for a while, but he wasn’t even aware of it until Cartman inched his way farther up, his thumb slowly going back and forth the fabric of his jeans. It was so subtle that he didn’t even think Cartman was aware of it either. His mouth had suddenly gone dry and he had to clear his throat._ _

_ _He was about to make some stupid comment, but then a completely unnecessary sex scene began and Kyle screeched and buried his head in Cartman’s shoulder. He took a deep breath in, and the smell of Cartman’s natural scent was something he hadn’t smelled in a while and for some reason he didn’t want to take his head out._ _

_ _“You’re a different person when you’re drunk.” Cartman commented, sounding awfully amused. _ _

_ _Kyle lifted his head up and frowned. “No I’m not.”_ _

_ _“Okay, lightweight. I’ve had the same amount of beer as you and I’m not half as trashed.” _ _

_ _“Well, that’s not fucking fair.”_ _

_ _“It kinda is.”_ _

_ _“How?”_ _

_ _“It’s called tolerance, Jew. You see, Heidi forces me to go to parties with her and they are only bearable with copious amounts of Bud Light. Street smartz.”_ _

_ _Kyle felt like he had no control of his emotions, and Heidi’s name killed a bit of his buzz and left a bad taste in his mouth. Cartman must have noticed the scowl on his face._ _

_ _“Are you okay?” He asked with a worried expression._ _

_ _“Why the fuck wouldn’t I be?” Kyle brings his still pretty full can of beer to his lips, but his clouded mind makes a miscalculation and a good amount pours down his chin and onto his shirt._ _

_ _“Weak, dude.” He slurs out, helplessly wiping the liquid and spreading it even more._ _

_ _“Alright, give me that.” Cartman says as he grabs for the can. Kyle moves away as he retorts, “No.”_ _

_ _“Seriously?”_ _

_ _“Yes, seriously.” Kyle lets out a laugh and his mood quickly shifts. “Not like you are gonna do anything about it.” _ _

_ _He tilts his head, it's an unspoken challenge of sorts, and he prays in his head that Cartman takes it. A still moment hangs in the air, and Kyle can feel his heartbeat in his ears. _ _

_ _Cartman shoves his hand out quickly to grab at the can but Kyle lifts his arm up in the air faster. They wrestle over it for a bit, and before they knew it, Kyle was being shoved into the arm of the couch as Cartman attempted to grab at his hand. _ _

_ _They both stilled when they realized how close their faces have gotten. With Cartman’s knee shoved in between his thighs and the blue technicolor light projected onto his face, Kyle felt a rush of adrenaline through his body. Kyle was also pretty sure that Cartman’s eyes were stuck on his lips for what felt like an eternity, and the sounds of their panting were overriding the dialogue coming from his TV speakers._ _

_ _Kyle inched his face closer, the slightest bit when they were both too still, but he was taken by surprise (and slight disappointment) when Cartman moved away and grabbed his arm from moving to snatch the beer out of his hands._ _

_ _“Fucking asshole.”_ _

_ _Cartman ignores his insult and bends forward to place their cans onto the coffee table scattered with empty ones._ _

_ _“Alright.” Cartman slaps his knees and stands up. “Bedtime.”_ _

_ _“What the fuck, no?” Kyle curls up on the couch, insistent on fighting back._ _

_ _“Yes! It’s 1 A.M and also a school night.”_ _

_ _“Since when the fuck do you care about that?”_ _

_ _“Oh trust me, _I_ don’t. But sober Kyle does, and he would punch me in the nose if I let whatever this is go on.”_ _

_ _“But I’m sober.”_ _

_ _“Sure buddy. Come on.” Cartman firmly takes his arm and threads it around his neck, supporting his waist with a hand as they walk to his room upstairs. They reach Kyle’s bed and Cartman loosens his grip to allow him to collapse on his bedsheets, but on the way down Kyle pulls on his sleeves with purpose and chuckles when Cartman stumbles on top of him, his hands on both sides at his shoulders, hovering on top of him._ _

_ _Kyle clutches to the fabrics bunched around his arms, and slowly slides his hands up to grip both sides of Cartman’s face._ _

_ _“You’re so handsome.” His voice is low and on edge, and Kyle can hear Cartman swallow. He subtly shakes his head with an unreadable expression on his face. “Alright, Kyle.”_ _

_ _“I mean it.”_ _

_ _Cartman’s eyebrows raised up. “You’re drunk.”_ _

_ _“That doesn’t mean shit.”_ _

_ _“This is fucking weird.”_ _

_ _“You are the one making it weird.” _ _

_ _Cartman painfully pulls his face away from Kyle’s, and opts for the empty space next to him instead._ _

_ _Kyle shrugs and places both his arms above his head. “I still think about it.”_ _

_ _“About what?” Cartman sounded out of breath._ _

_ _“Our kiss.”_ _

_ _“Kyle…”_ _

_ _“You tasted so good.”_ _

_ _“I should get going.”_ _

_ _“You didn’t like it? You kissed me back.”_ _

_ _Cartman stayed silent, turning his head over to the side to look him in the eyes. They were so close that Kyle could smell the cheap alcohol on his breath along with his own smell laced in. Just an inch closer and their lips would connect, but his heart was beating impossibly fast and he was afraid that he might have a heart attack. He wanted to move his head forward, so badly that it hurt, but realization hit him hard that even if he did that wouldn’t change shit._ _

_ _Tears quickly formed in the corners of his eyes and he had to turn away. “God, I fucking hate this.” He rubs at his eyes, leaving his arm to cover his face._ _

_ _“What-“_ _

_ _“I wanted you so bad.” Kyle’s arms fall to his sides limply as he examines his ceiling. This was so overwhelming, the alcohol, the tension all night, the smell of him on his sheets now, everything was crashing in his brain and he felt so frustrated and cornered, like he could break down in a mess of tears any second. “I mean, I still fucking do. I wish I didn’t but _holy shit._ I literally think about you all the fucking time and I know you do too and it’s been this way for so long and I don't think I can handle it anymore.”_ _

_ _Kyle hesitates, and swallowed. A question is on the tip of his tongue, and if it slips out he wasn’t sure if he can handle the answer he didn’t want. But the beer rushed and swirled in his blood now, and the alcohol made the decision for him._ _

_ _“Do you want me too or am I just... imagining all of this?”_ _

_ _Kyle finally turned his head over to look Cartman in his eyes. He had his brows furrowed and his mouth was slightly ajar, like he was at a loss for words._ _

_ _Kyle pursed his lips and shook his head at the disappointing response, a laugh with no amusement slipping out of his mouth. “I’m going crazy, huh? Jesus...”_ _

_ _“You’re drunk.” Cartman repeated._ _

_ _“You know how I feel already, asshole.”_ _

_ _Cartman hesitates then, a moment that makes Kyle’s heart jump in his chest with hope, but it quickly passes and he untangles himself from the sheets. _ _

_ _“Um, look, I’ll come by tomorrow and check on you. Okay?” Cartman’s voice is low and quiet, and Kyle could hear the slight sympathy and wants to shoot his fucking brains out. _ _

_ _He instead wordlessly watches him as he collects his stuff. Cartman stops at the doorway, and turns his head over his shoulder. Kyle could have sworn that his eyes were glossy and that there was a slight shiver on his bottom lip, but it quickly turned into a pursed smile and just like that, Cartman was gone._ _

_ _Kyle knocks out, his face still wet and his heart on his sleeve._ _

_ _————-_ _

_ _The day after a rough night of partying, Kyle felt like the mom of the group. He would usually drive over to Stan or Kenny’s house, it alternated between the two, and would nurse the two dumbasses back to health._ _

_ _When he would hold up a bucket to Stan’s face and stroke his hand through his hair to comfort and soothe, or drive to the store to buy Kenny comfort food and Advil, he would silently think in the back of his mind that they must have been over exaggerating._ _

_ _Kyle learned the hard way that they were in fact, not._ _

_ _“Kyle? Kyle..” Sheila’s voice was faint but too loud at the same time as he slowly slipped into awareness. Her cold hands pressed against his forehead, and as he slowly regained his vision, he immediately felt the pounding in the back of his head. _ _

_ _“Fuck.” Kyle groaned out, sitting up slowly._ _

_ _“What is going on, Kyle? You smell like beer.”_ _

_ _“I didn’t drink.” He quickly blurts out. That was definitely a shitty attempt at being innocent, and if he looked half as shitty as he felt, he knew that Sheila could tell exactly what was going on. But Sheila surprisingly didn't seem all too angry. She was definitely concerned though, slight disappointment in her green eyes._ _

_ _“It is 9 A.M, young man. I can not believe your father didn’t wake you up.”_ _

_ _“I’m sorry.”_ _

_ _“We will talk about this when I get home. Get some rest for now. I’m leaving for work so if you need anything call your father's phone.”_ _

_ _Sheila patted his blanketed lap, a gentle smile on her face and walked out of his room, shutting his door softly._ _

_ _“Don’t forget to eat!” He hears his mother call out before he heard the front door shut as well. He collapses right back into his bed._ _

_ _——————-_ _

_ _While Sheila and Gerald are away at work, Kyle mopes around the house, his hangover making his head pound even harder than the morning after a restless, study-filled night. He is in the middle of drinking red Gatorade after he searched up hangover cures, and nearly chokes when he hears a knock at the door. He groans, screws the plastic lid shut, and slowly makes his way toward it._ _

_ _When he twists the doorknob open, the 3 P.M sunlight knocks him right in the face, causing his arm to go up and act as a shield to his eyes._ _

_ _“Fuck!” Kyle murmurs under his breath._ _

_ _“Hey Jewboy. You look fantastic.” _ _

_ _He slowly opened his eyes, still squinting, trying to adjust to the overwhelming brightness._ _

_ _“Shut up. I'm hungover.” _ _

_ _“Yeah, I can tell.” Cartman said, slight disgust laced in his voice. Cartman still had his backpack on, and a few books in his hands._ _

_ _“By the way, you missed our spanish project. You made me present by myself._ _

_ _“Shit. I completely forgot. I’m sorry.”_ _

_ _“I guess it’s fine. I killed that shit anyway. A+, baby.”_ _

_ _Kyle stared at him with a blank expression. There was an awkward silence, and Kyle wasn’t entirely sure what the fuck he was doing here._ _

_ _“So... you gonna let me inside or are you gonna make me stand on your porch all day?”_ _

_ _“Ugh.” Kyle moves aside hesitantly and Cartman walks right past him. He shuts the door when they are both inside. “How are you not as hungover as me? I feel like I’m dying.”_ _

_ _Cartman takes his backpack off and throws it on the couch. “Like I said, Jewboy, it’s all about that tolerance.”_ _

_ _They both stand awkwardly in the middle of his living room, and Kyle rubs up and down his left arm, unsure of what to do._ _

_ _“Look, Kyle, we need to talk about last night.”_ _

_ _“Oh my god.” He shakes his head and dismissively waves his hand. “I don’t want to do that. My head hurts too much and I’d rather we forget that I said anything and-“_ _

_ _And before he knew it, Cartman’s lips were on his._ _

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you enjoyed! C:


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